It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I checked into jail on foursquare
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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