Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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