i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
