i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
