OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Its about making memories worth repressing
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Never underestimate the power of titties
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