Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
you never un-have a 4some
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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