He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
