Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
