I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Randomize