I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
