At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
