My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
