what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
