he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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