Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
