After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit