I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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