Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.

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(902): The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling. http://tfl.nu/4suj

Replies (6) Good night (676) Bad night (3571)
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(916): View more from California

awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment

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(916): awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment http://tfl.nu/ypy1

Replies (35) Good night (595) Bad night (3432)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.

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(413): Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot. http://tfl.nu/sr3w

Replies (19) Good night (9568) Bad night (1358)
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(443): View more from Maryland

we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.

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(443): we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it. http://tfl.nu/i4yi

Replies (13) Good night (4077) Bad night (757)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?

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(701): Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire? http://tfl.nu/pmju

Replies (3) Good night (1475) Bad night (2009)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating

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(603): He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating http://tfl.nu/fvws

Replies (10) Good night (3406) Bad night (1018)
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(678): View more from Georgia

Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.

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(678): Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary. http://tfl.nu/nvwp

Replies (17) Good night (4916) Bad night (797)
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(616): View more from Michigan

EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.

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(616): EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA. http://tfl.nu/4vpy

Replies (9) Good night (1731) Bad night (597)
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(773): View more from Illinois

Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.

(213): View more from California

I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.

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(773): Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA. (213): I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars. http://tfl.nu/q1ju

Replies (15) Good night (1861) Bad night (705)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.

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(902): I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas. http://tfl.nu/cu8d

Replies (4) Good night (1385) Bad night (898)
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(61): View more from Australia

Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair

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(61): Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair http://tfl.nu/j3o5

Replies (7) Good night (559) Bad night (370)
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(716): View more from New York

It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!

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(716): It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT! http://tfl.nu/5pm7

Replies (1) Good night (483) Bad night (955)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.

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(336): Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups. http://tfl.nu/v7i7

Replies (6) Good night (887) Bad night (405)
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(239): View more from Florida

It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?

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(239): It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class? http://tfl.nu/6z5l

Replies (17) Good night (334) Bad night (729)
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(815): View more from Illinois

You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.

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(815): You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother. http://tfl.nu/agj9

Replies (8) Good night (208) Bad night (872)

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