it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
