if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
