guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
