She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
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