The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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