Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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