we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
