Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
