Fine. I'll sleep in my office
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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