also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
