Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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