i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize