Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
