Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
