She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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