I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
