she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
