Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
