put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
