i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize