guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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