I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Randomize
