im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
