Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
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To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
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I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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