Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
