did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
