So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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