how hairy? two words: wookie tits
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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