why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize