East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize