i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
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