she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
