He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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