Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
