meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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